Facebook Etiquette

Shaky Shaky

Mrs Funk sighed luxuriously, half asleep.

‘Well the earth certainly moved then darling’

Then the earthquake struck…

Does anyone find it a bit wrong that they name the source of a phenomenon that makes you shake around like a shiteing dog, the ‘Epicentre’?

I AM going to hell!

Breaking News

… from our roving reporter.

Apparently, a recent break in at Shipley Police Station, in which a large quantity of sanitary equipment was stolen from the  bathrooms, has left police baffled.

A spokesperson was heard to comment ‘I can honestly say, we have nothing to go on’

Cheers Claire!

Burn, Funky, Burn!

Just a quick note to secure my place in the fiery pits of hell:

My mate just rang me from Bridgend.  His car’s broken down and he needs a tow.  I’ll have to take my own rope though – you can’t get one for love or money down there!

Ba Dum Ching!

A Beadle for Friday

Jeremy beadles Funeral arrangements have been released there will be a family service followed by a small finger buffet

Discussion Group

I was discussing the demise of Jeremy Beadle with Art Danfunkel yesterday…

He proposed the theory that we may have fated his death somehow by (among other things of course) making jokes about the poor guys gimpy withered hand in the Kings on Sunday.  With this in mind, we would like to invite all members of the group who were involved in that conversation to meet up again to discuss Manchester United in some depth.

That includes Herbie, who MUST wear his mexican sombrero, as we are working on the premise that a new career direction has landed him the job as Angel of Death and the hat is part of his divine uniform.

If that is not the case, well, it DID suit him!

Coming Thick and Fast

Jeremy Beadle has requested his remains be recycled into compost and scattered on his garden. ITV sources say he could be back in early autumn with ‘Watch Out Beadles A Sprout !’

One More (for now)

Jeremy beadles cremation is going to be the the first to be screened live. It will be called ‘YOU’VE BEEN FLAMED’

Second Beadle

Jeremy beadle’s wife has just made an announcement thanking everyone for their support following the death of her husband. She’s says she is managing for now but may need a little hand in the future.

First Beadle

Apparently people all over the UK have been applauding jeremy beadle’s life. In fact it’s expected god will give him a big hand when he gets to heaven!